Wednesday, June 10, 2015

What The Stars Know And I Don't - Part II

The Chamber

Jasmine spread its shy aroma
On my bosom,
Lying like a snake
Coiling around my heaving chest
Strangulating my breath
As his faced appeared
Piercing the translucence
Of curtains
Preserving my dignity
To be shattered like glass
The moment he set foot in my chamber.

Like ambers,
My heart burnt.
He carried the promise of vermillion
A splash of red on my forehead,
Inked my life
Made me his wife
To love, honour, consume and destroy.

I stood trembling,
As his fingers traced the contours of my body.
I was titillated, in places I knew not existed
On the uneven topography of my body.
Is this how the Earth feels each day the Sun kisses it with golden rays?
Is this how a lone tree feels when under the influence of wild winds it sways?
Is this how tremors of joy erupt in on silent terrains?
Is this the experience which makes a woman turn vain?

Like Shakuntala basking in Dushyanta’s gaze,
Like Sita glowing through Rama’s face
Like Vasavadatta conjured in Udayan’s dream
I lay fulfilled in my lover’s embrace.

I looked outside the window, as the sky turned a shade darker, and stars turned a touch brighter. Tell me, o stars, can I continue this love-play till eternity?

Painting by George Astametakis


Part one of the post can be read here.

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Badi Pagal Si Ladki Hai

Prelude - For my birthday this year, I got many gifts, in gestures, in words, in books, in love - in many other manifestations, but the gift I am sharing with you all here is the most special among them. To have had these words read out to me was an experience nothing short of magical and extremely humbling. Gratitude fills me as I post this -

Badi paagal si ladki hai..
Ajab khwaabon mein rehti hai..

Bikhre baal rakhti hai…
Alag sa haal rakhti hai…

Alag ek dhun mein rehti hai…
Hamesha hasti rehti hai…

Kabhi khamosh ho jaye…
Yun toh kam hi hota hai…
Ke jab khamosh hoti hai…
Fiza pe rang nahi chadhta..
Bahaarein laut jaati hain…
Ghatayein ghir bhi jaayein gar…
Boondein dam nahi bharti…

Aur jab muskuraati hai…
Gul bhi muskuraate hain…
Mausam khil ke aate hain…

Ajeeb ik zid si hai pakde…
Ke Gul sehraa mein khilaane hain
Sab kaante mehkaane hain..
Roton ko hasaana hai, roothon ko manaana hai..
Gham duniya ke mitaane hain..

Kabhi koi jo gham, uska..
Gar humsaaya ho jaye…

Gham se ru-ba-ru hokar..
Milaa kar aankh har ranj se…
Yun muskuraayegi..
Ke gham muskura dega

Dard ki baahon mein daal kar baahein …
Yun gungunaayegi…
Ke dard bhi gungunaayega…

Koi bhi dharm duniya ka…
Isko soojhta kab hai…
Mohabbat pooja karti hai..
Mohabbat socha karti hai…

Kabhi poochho sabab iska..
Toh hans ke itna kehti hai…
Ke tum dekhna jaana…
..Ke tum dekhna jaana…
Ik roz duniya ko…
Mohabbat Main sikha dungi..
Ik roz duniya ko…
Main ishq bana dungi…

Badi Deewani ladki hai…

Ke bas khwaabon mein rehti hai…


Picture credits - Mayank Austen Soofi

Sunday, May 3, 2015

The Lore of Dungri-Garasiya Bhils

Marija Sres was a name I was not familiar with till about three days ago. Today, three days later, it is a name which has begun commanding decent amounts of respect from me. A religious sister, she came to work with the rural population of India and succeeded in impacting not just the spiritual and economic lifestyles of people by understanding their core problems; but also left an indelible mark on the literary landscape of Gujarat. The doyens of Gujarati literature have themselves acknowledged her genius and genuineness - she carried to the literary domains the legends of tribals and outcastes, about whom, even Gandhian activists shied away from writing. Literature, after all, was an elite, and puritanical domain. However, Marija Sres put in the effort of not only learning Gujarati, but also finding a subject of writing which won her the prime regional literary award.

At a discount fair organized by Zubaan, I came upon this really interesting title - "First Their Was A Woman, and other stories". Slightly subversive, or dreamily assertive - I could not decide. Centuries of religious instruction would have ingrained in us the secondary-ness of a woman's origin. God first created Man, isn't it? The lore of Dungri Garasiya Bhils would differ. The unique ring of this narrative does not end here. Not only did their existence begin with a woman - the procreation and continuation happened without the presence of man. In fact, in the legends, wherever a man is mentioned, he is shown to be deceptive, or silly, or incapable of taking valorous decisions, unless prodded by the female. Such powerful depiction, that even the simplistic manner of writing jolted me completely. 


The all encompassing entity in the tribal culture is Kudrat, who is said to have created Pruthvi first - a female entity. Upon Pruthvi, Kudrat placed a lot of elements to beautify it. The first human to find its way to Pruthvi was a woman, painstakingly created by Kudrat as a Murti out of earth, carved and shaped unto perfection. She was called Sati (root word - Sat - meaning truth). The intrigue in this myth does not end here. When Sati found herself alone, while there were more of other kinds of species, she had an urge to procreate - and this she did with the help of Sapsi - a serpent, and not by desiring a male partner. The Pruthvi, thus, was a woman's kingdom. 

Stories which form a part of tribal orature are not mere instruments of amusement. In them lie explanations for historical changes and sociological connections. In the story of Kava and Kavi, I understood how the naturally more vivacious and energetic female was slowed down using the treachery of beautiful garments and accessories, while she was caught unaware in the web of deceit concocted by male ego. The eternal nature of a woman's love was reinforced in the stories, and adequate light was also thrown on instances where a woman becomes a woman's worst enemy. This, as per my understanding, happens due to the rivalry that economic and social dependence on man bring about between females. 

Because the tribal culture of Dungri Bhils, like most others, was animist since its ancient beginnings, a lot of supernatural instances find their way into the stories. People are gifted with the power of understanding the tongue of animals, and the source of vitality for humans resides in natural elements too. I have a feeling that the hierarchical structure, if any, in these societies would be - Kudrat (Invisible entity), Nature (Visible power), Woman, Man, and rest of the creatures. In a story about crows, the Queen is shown to be assertive and cunning enough to guide her King towards a right decision. In the only story where a King is the Supreme, he is shown to be unreasonable and silly. Snakes and Cobras have been depicted as benevolent and protecting species. 

My favourite stories in the book are two - 
1. Bhaliya and Priya - a love story, which talks of oppression by the King, and then dark, covert revenge by the lovers. Love is the vital force which oppression cannot mess with for long. 
2. Alkhi and Dhulki - a story of sister love, which presents an alternate version to the beginnings of Sati. 

India is a land of such diverse and glorious folk-tales! The more one delves deeper, the more is he surprised with the kind of degeneration that has affected our morality and belief systems. Harking back to animist and tribal traditions is always enriching and endearing in a shocking sort of way. And sometimes, it needs the eye of an outsider to locate stories in a patch of ourselves we forget to acknowledge and appreciate. 

Marija Sres' book is an easy 4 on 5 stars. Thanks to Zubaan for bringing forward this wonderful book to an urban audience.

Monday, April 13, 2015

I Steal From You (I Steal You)

I steal.
I steal you away from your laptop
Into whose glare you fish
For the strained brightness
And aspired automation of dreams
Only, you understand them wrong
Dreams aren't used to automation.
They are built from the romance
 Of exasperation.
Of figments you inherently know
Are not yours to live and die with.
Dreams are what I have
Which steal shreds of reality
Into a make believe world
Where you're not endlessly staring
Into your painfully flawless machine.
But my eyes.
Just my eyes. 
(My once brown, then golden eyes.)
And then in my being.

I steal.
I steal from you some touches.
Cheap, you'd think.
The problem, my dear, is,
Each time your bump into me
Or your hand brushes my arm
Or you casually tousle my hair
A million tremors assail my skin
And that which lies deep within.
Your innocent touches
Embolden me
To plant deliberate caresses
On whatever of you
I wish to consume.
You might not know
But my head resting on your shoulder
Is the least innocent act
My mind can conjure.
(While I am at it, 
The pain of my thoughts,
Only heaven may endure.)

I steal.
I steal you away to the moon
No less.
And there, I force you
To force me
Into violent, cheesy lovemaking
With six time the passion
And one sixth the weight.
You lie light on my chest
Even as your heavy breathing
Pretends to cover
My uncovered, undiscovered lust..
Did you hear the sonorousness?
Of a heart learning to fly
And cry again? 
The taste of the tears
Is like a jolt into reality
As if salt existed
Only to scratch and wound the stealth
I employ
To gain you. 

I steal. 
I steal to realise
What I stole from you
Belonged not to you
In the first place. 
I steal to erode moments
Off MY limited life span
Placing happy packets
Full of airy airs
In fancy showcases
Of a humongous villa
You and I built
In a stolen moment of intimacy. 
These happy packets
Would burst and cackle
And bring down the villa. 
The only pain of which
Could be felt in my heart
(While you'd continue to stare
And pester for automation of dreams.)

I steal.
I steal but fail to realise.
If I am cheating you,
Or slapping myself a challan
(Calculated in time and heart units)
For yet again jumping
The danger signal
And stepping on the desire path
Through sylvan silks
Leading to the lake
With enough water
To drown me proper. 

In the world of metaphors,
No theft goes unrewarded.
But love does. 
And so, the lover in me
Will continue being a thief,
With loot
Than being a lover
With love cut loose. 

PC - lizkapiloto (etsy)






Saturday, April 4, 2015

What The Stars Know And I Don't

The Lake

Beseeching
I look at the stars
Twinkling as scars
On the dark landscape of my memory.

Screeching
My words in my ears
Mere seconds converted to years
From the time you left me.

Pleading
My heart to for his love
For the heaven above
To pull aside the curtain of fury.

Feeling
The arrogance turn to dust
The soul poised to burst
Into a million shreds of agony.

PC - Mohit Tyagi


I sat alone, alone with the stars, remembering the tick-tock of his steps hurrying out of our house. The tick-tock of his leaving resonated till much later in the sounds of the clock. Time serves as a reminder of his love and my envy, his embrace and my pride, his loyalty and my doubt. I’m sitting, sitting along, gazing at the stars, to spot a speck of his reflection.


I know not where he is. Probably the stars do.